Vampries suck review

Becca Crane moves to the sleepy town of Sporks and finds herself torn between two men. There's sparkling vampire Edward, whose commitment issues stem from his bloodsucking family trying to eat his prospective girlfriends, and his dogged rival for her affections, Jacob. Hilarity ensues on a rollercoaster through pop culture and teenage vampire relationships. Oh, I should probably mention at this point in the review that Vampires Suck is utter dogshit. I think, to some extent, the world has been waiting for a decent Twilight spoof, but boy, this is not it. Hell, if the real films were intended as satire, they'd be lauded as the best comedy films ever, with great deadpan performances from Robert Pattinson and all concerned.
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Vampires Suck Review

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Vampires Suck review | Den of Geek

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Vampires Suck – review

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T he last time I heard a film audience in such a state of silence was during Ingmar Bergman's Winter Light. Jason Friedman and Aaron Seltzer have specialised in genre spoofs such as Date Movie, Disaster Movie and Meet the Spartans, and now they're back with a desperately, almost fanatically unfunny version of the Twilight franchise. Matt Lanter plays Edward Sullen, the pale teen-vampire hottie, and Jenn Proske does what I admit is a nifty impression of Kristen Stewart, playing Becca, the glum girl who falls in love with him but can't have sex in case she becomes one of the undead. They gaze intensely into each other's eyes as one of the nerdy choric high-schoolers says: "Damn that overwrought unrequited teenage love! Was that the observational-comedy mot juste?
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